Laziness or ADHD?

Many people can mistake common symptoms of ADHD as examples of laziness. If you have ADHD and someone referred to you as lazy that might have hurt your feelings. The stigma around people with ADHD being lazy needs to be addressed. ADHD affects people in ways that are hard for them to control. People with ADHD should not be judged for their condition. I hope that this post brings more empathy and understanding to all people with ADHD. If you are a parent and your child has this condition, I hope that you can use this information to advocate for your kid if someone ever calls them “lazy” or “unmotivated.”

What Does it Mean to be Lazy?

What do you think of when you think of the word “lazy?” Here are some ideas that probably appear in your mind: unmotivated, not paying attention, checked out, couch potato, reluctant, etc. Thinking of someone as lazy has a negative connotation. Being lazy signifies that someone is wasting their time and energy not being productive or doing anything useful. 

Let’s try looking at others in a more empathetic way. What if someone stays in bed all day not because they are lazy but because they have depression? Many times, people with depression lack motivation and hope in life. What if you found out that someone you thought of as lazy had ADHD? It is important to realize that everyone you meet is complex and different in their own way. Think of people like icebergs – many times we see the surface level of people, but there is plenty more hiding under the water. In light of this example, try to remember that people with ADHD have certain symptoms that can cause them to seem “lazy.” Let’s look further into the iceberg. 

What Does it Mean to Have ADHD?

According to the CDC, people with ADHD “have a persistent pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development.” When someone has ADHD they find it hard to pay attention, focus, commit to complicated tasks, sit still, or wait their turn. These symptoms interfere with their lives and can affect them in school, work, or social situations. 

Many of the symptoms of ADHD can look like traits of a lazy person. As mentioned before, a lazy person might seem like they are unmotivated, not paying attention, and checked out. People with ADHD get distracted easily. All of our brains are different; people with ADHD might just have a lower threshold for paying attention and focusing. Since it is hard for them to focus and sit still, people with ADHD might resist doing tasks that take a larger amount of time, like homework. So, for example, when you see a child with ADHD not doing their homework, this can be the reason. The child might be focused on watching a TV show. Their television time may portray them as lazy or avoidant of doing work.

Tips for ADHD and Doing Work/Studying

If your child has ADHD, TeensHealth offers some great tips to follow. Some helpful ideas are to minimize distractions and use tools that promote organization. 

If your child is trying to do homework or study, advise them to:

  • Turn off the TV, distracting music, or sounds

  • Put their phone in another room so they won’t be tempted to grab it

  • Use planners or calendars to keep track of their work

Another tip involves having your child get active each day. Daily exercise can be a great way to have your child with ADHD release all the energy they feel is stored up. Daily exercise can include taking walks, doing jumping jacks, running in place, swimming, dancing, and more! The best way to commit to a type of exercise is to do something that you enjoy. The possibilities are endless! 

Takeaway Thoughts

Try to be kinder and more understanding to the people you judge as “lazy.” You never know what might be causing them to present this way. The stigma of being lazy is not helpful for someone with ADHD to deal with. If anything, being labeled as something negative might make a child with ADHD even more reluctant to do their work. In fact, research has shown that stigma towards people with ADHD can affect their life satisfaction and mental well-being. I have my own tip for people with ADHD: Don’t listen to the people who doubt you! You are strong and capable of doing anything!  

This conversation also brings up the idea of our society’s obsession with being productive 24/7. What does “lazy” even mean nowadays? When people are expected to work non-stop and produce results endlessly, is it so bad to want to take time and sit on the couch to watch an episode of your favorite show? Remember that it is ok to take breaks, rest, and recharge. Job burnout is real, and a proper work-life balance is necessary for our survival. We should be teaching our kids that working hard is great but their mental and physical health should be respected in the process. At the end of the day, we are all humans, not machines.

Jackie Caputo, LMFT in Woodland Hills, CA | Therapy for Anxiety and Depression in Woodland Hills

About the Author

Jackie Caputo is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who provides therapy in Woodland Hills, CA. She also provides online therapy in California to individuals throughout the state.